I'm in the middle of a major "meh" fest with myself. Feeling dissatisfied, sort of, and stuck, sort of, and yet comfortable, and on top of that, not having a clue what to do different.
Maybe it's part of grieving.
Maybe it's just part of me. The struggle to "find" myself.
(My mother in her demented wisdom would have said, "You're right here.")
"Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it." -- Tallulah Bankhead
******************************
Anyway.
I "found" myself in Carrboro on Friday to get my car serviced at the always terrific Auto Logic.
Carrboro was the first town I lived in when I moved to NC and it has that special first-town place in my heart.
I sat outside Weaver Street Market enjoying a coffee and Dwell magazine while Auto Logic did their magic:
This was inside:
The morning was hazy, a bit cool.
Walking over, I saw things I hadn't seen before. Like this fountain:
And this lovely scene across Weaver Street as I thought about thin women with bearded men who smiled at me inside when I got coffee and seemed chagrined when they saw me outside and the thin woman was next to them:
******************************************************************
"Hells Bells" by Cary Ann Hearst:
Oh my goodness... I am in love with that fountain! That's my favorite sort of thing on this whole Earth. Wow. Incredible.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes! I think you're in the process of changing and finding not only yourself, but who God wants to be inside of you. I think we're all there, actually, just standing in different spots along the road. Or something. But anyway, it's a really good place once we get what's going on and just try to cooperate with the whole life-long, life-altering process. Blessings, Debra
I lived in Carrboro the spring semester of my senior year in college. I also worked off and on for Aurora which used to be in a small mall somewhere in Carrboro. I was a cocktail waitress while in college and then when I lived in Chapel Hill for a year after graduating, I worked as a waitress there. Good, good memories -- all around.
ReplyDelete